Feb 27, 2005

dalawang linggong walang maisulat na paksa.. and ended up ranting about singlehood..

it has been a very busy week for us. busy on cleaning up and rearranging things the way it used to be. sometimes when i get all the things done for the day, i go to powerbooks and read something. and oh! it kinda remind me that i've been single for the past 3 years now... single and... hell yeah! its great to be single once in awhile... err.. sometimes... heheheh! have anyone of you ever experienced a single moment when your walking alone in some places like on malls, diners, movie houses, parks and even on unexpected places like parking lots, comfort rooms and at your very own home when all of the people around are sweet, the background sounds are conducive for romantic couples. i am standing at that kind of crowd at the center and everyone just looks perfect with someone in their sides, holding each other as if the night's gonna last forever. i've seen couples, bi sexual, gays and lesbians. it doesnt matter. for as long they've got company, smiles lifting their hearts out in full blossom. sometimes i do get the feeling of being stared at but they really not. these imaginations of a 22 year old single guy makes me sigh sometimes... it sucks but it's ok... sometimes i've reached the point of accepting the fact that i'm gonna be a hermit! (thanks for the inspiration ms. Tiepee.. hahah!) but there are times that i long for someone... isn't nice to know that someone out there really cares about you and you care about that person too? haaayy... (ccigaux sings.. come singin' in the rain..) but thanks to everyone else that taught me some real concepts and ideologies about love...
weytaminit!!!! i'm not ready to commit yet... i'll make sure that this second time around when i find that so called real love.. it will be my first and i'll make it last for the rest of my life...

three years had past and those 3 years carved finely my personality towards love, life, friendship, relationships, family and everything in between... i think i can survive this stage called singlehood.... trust me, ccigaux you will!



random question of the week:

how much would you give up in the name of Love?

Feb 14, 2005

very important acknowledgement...

i thanked God for each and everyone of them. these are the heart-warming people who helped us get through with it, sacrificed for us in the name of friendship and prayed for us twentyfourseven:

calculus
mommy ven
chubz
jeffcrazy and family
jepi& family
ralph6&family
carlock
veann
sweet
ashley
chelsea
chubby and family
bubbaray
toots
deempee
ms. b
ms. iya & tita
freyti and family
ms.russ
ms. cali
ms.wenk
ms. kessa
ms. aecee
ms.kooky
ms.pammy
ms. chum
ms.tieppee

my bandmates jijaw, dj and japox
some of my high school/gradeschool friends who doesnt want their names to be posted here but i'll post it anywei... hahha michael grageda, donald dela cruz and ryan lejano & family.
my couzin karen

this may not be enough for all the little to the biggest help you've done to save us from being a houseless family pero buong puso akong nagpapasalamat sa inyo on behalf of my family! buong puso ko din pong ibabalita sa inyo na nakabangon na po kami.

Feb 2, 2005

this is something near being homeless.

warning: a very long engagement... i mean.. post. hehe..

BAM! BAM! BAM! these are the sounds i heard minutes after i woke up early saturday morning. it was the day when my barkada and i long planning to be in enchanted kingdom. an event that will surely made my month more happier... or so i thought... those loud bams i heard are coming from the roof of our dilapidated apartment. an apartment we lived for almost 30 years. 30 years of awful and beautiful memories from childhood to adult, from having a relationship to break ups, from "inuman" sessions of my dad & his kabarkada until the birth of my band mates! as i looked in at the walls that were once white and our ceilings that were once invicible of cracks and scratches, every corner of it gaved me the warm feeling of being a kid again. it all comes back with those funny memories of me with my family and friends. takbuhan din itong bahay ng mga may problema. problema sa pag ibig, salapi, pamilya, pulitika, sa sarili at pag aaral. this proves that those people coming in with or without problems are those people who felt someway or somehow -homeless. and they all fealt the welcoming warmth of our place. sabi nga ng aking ina "takbuhan itong bahay ng mga may problema kahit noong binata pa ang ama mo." hanggang nga raw sa nag asawa si pa ay tradisyon na ata ng bahay na ito ang mag pa-tuloy, tumanggap at mag aruga ng mga taong minsan ding sumuko sa mga pagsubok. ewan ko ba, hamak lamang na apartment ito. hindi naman mukhang simbahan, santuwaryo o seminaryo. some of my friends say that they do not come for the house, they come because of the people living inside the house that makes the house become a home.

i bring you back in to the timeline january 29, 2005. the loud noise of a hammer gaved us the indication that the renovation had begun. it begun even in the middle of our breakfast and even in the middle of 5 people living below it. they began removing the roof without any warning. oh how rude those carpenters. then shortly, the land lady or should i say one of the land ladies came and knocked infront of our door smiling as though it brings good news for our sacred ears. but right after she stepped inside and saying "magandang umaga" in a very unlikely manner, she discussed about leaving permanently out to their apartment. and that for us is an untimely news since we've just came out through a big problem before. sabi nila, hindi daw pwedeng tumigil kasi "arawan" daw ang bayad sa mga karpintero kaya para sa kanila mahalaga ang oras... their time is of the essence even if it costs them a life- our life. walang pangundangang pukpukan knowing na marupok na yung flooring sa taas dahil sa anay. its been years and even a tiny wood you could see have never been renovated ever since. they do lack good management ever since the "real" owner (which was their deceased mom.) managing it. but how could we expect good management when all of them failed to finished elementary and they all are failures of good manners and right conduct. its more than a course subject. it is something you have within your heart and soul. it is something you adopt in because of God. sadya ba talagang napaka hirap magpaka tao? so ayun, they gaved us a week starting from 29th to look for another apartment. 2 days have passed, nakapag balot at impake na kami, but still no deffinite place to live because of lack in financial security. natuloy yung enchanted kingdom despite the fact that my family and i are on the verge of being houseless. for as long as i have my family and friends and my Lord God,i will never be homeless.

...........

iniwan ko muna pansamantala yung problema sa labas ng gate ng enchanted kingdom at pinahawak ko muna kay dumbledorn(yung mascot ng enchanted. di ko kasi alam yung real name e.hehehe) ang mga "burdens" ko sa buhay. hindi ako binigo at pinagbigyan akong sumaya ng kahit maghapon lang sa loob. ngunit sinisilip silip ko paminsanminsan ang ipinabibitbit kong bagaheng puno ng problema kay dumbledorn. dito ko napatunayan na may na iwan pa pala ako sa bulsa ko. kaya kahit nasa loob ako ng masasayang rides ng enchanted, paminsan minsan ay natutulala ako at nag iisip sa kalagayan ng pamilya kong tinitiis ang bawat palo ng martilyo at bawat baon ng pakong sing sakit ng balang ipinutok sa dibdib mo -ako'y nag aalala pa rin at minsan ay nag hahangad ng may makatuwang at ma iiyakan sa mga ganitong oras. gusto ko ng sumuko at tumumba ngunit kailangan pa rin lumaban.

Random Question Of the Week: first time kong sumakay sa space shuttle. kayo? naka sakay na rin ba? ano ang feeling ng "being
one with physics"?